"Pssst."

"Marica?"

"Yes, Missy?"

"Shhhh. You'll wake him up."

"Okay. What is it?"

"Marica. I've been doing some olfactory investigations and I fear that funky smell isn't just the moldy drywall in this room."

"What do you think it is in addition, Missy?"

"Well... . I hesitate to say but I think it may be... . Oh! This pains me so to say because I love him so. But I think it might be... Rocky."

"RUFF!!???"

"Now. Now. Calm down, Old Friend. Nothing personal."

"RUFF! Ruff ruff ruffffff. RufffffffFFFFF!!"

"Now, now, Rocky. No need to go all ad hominem on Missy."

"Oh! Why I never!! You have cut me to the bone, My Friend."

"Ruff. Ruff."

"Me? A big silly sissy?? Is that what you are calling me? Because I enjoyed my bath and you cut yours short with clear maloderiforous consequences?"

"Ruff?"

"Yeah. I don't think that's a word either, Rocky."

"Well! Be that as it may, I aim to please. And if I enjoyed the bath Miss M gave me, and if I smell good as a consequence, so be it. YOU STINK, My Dear Friend. And come to think of it... . Well."

"Alright. Alright. Rocky. It's true you don't smell all that good, even after your half-bath."

"Ruff."

"I know. You are a self-sufficient dog and you think you can keep yourself clean. Perhaps it's a matter of standards."

"ruff."

"And Missy isn't a silly sissy. You know that."

"Indeed I am not! I scared the sh.. "

"RUFF!"

"Oh. Sorry. ... I scared the living daylights out of that fellow who came to the door the other day."

"Ruff!"

"Thank you, Friend. I am quite intimidating when I bark in my low voice and jump up, aren't I?"

"Ruuuufffff... ruffff! Ruuuuufffff!"

"Okay. Okay. Enough. You know, Rocky, Daughter C will be back on the Farm soon. Maybe you would allow her to give you a decent bath."

"RUFF!! RUFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"What? Sister C is coming home!!???"

"Yes. For a little while."

"Oh my goodness! Oh my goodness!! We have so much upon which to catch up on! Hey! Rocky! Want to come into my box and snuggle and chat? Gosh! I wonder if she'll take us to the pasture?"

"R.u.f.f."

"G'night, y'all."

"Oh! Of course. Good night, Marica. Oh! Rocky!! C'mon, boy!"

"Ruff."