Just the facts, please. UPDATED

“Whether you are a Democrat or Republican or whether you’re libertarian or whatever, you are the best.” 

This one is partially correct. While Democrats are clearly the best, a broad consensus exists within the scientific community that Republicans are intrinsically evil and that most Libertarians are just pot heads.

Says Ned Rice, the so-called "fact-checker" of Mr. Eastwood's "speech" the other evening.

To be clear, neither Mr. Big Food nor I is a pothead. 

UPDATED: Do read the whole thing. It's funny! [Sorry 'bout that. Getting ready for Game Day!]